She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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