Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Randomize
