I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize
