if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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