I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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