its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
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