She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Randomize
