Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Randomize
