I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
No subtext here. People are naked.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize
