i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
Randomize
