It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
