Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
i believe in u and ur pee
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
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