I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
My ass is underappreciated
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
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