dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
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