I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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