Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Randomize
