he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
