Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Randomize