Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Randomize
