he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
