I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
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