i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I'm getting married
To pizza
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
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