I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Randomize
