Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
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