the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Randomize