I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
