ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
I'm sobbing to NWA
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize
