i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize