It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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