so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize