I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
