Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
