I think my vagina is haunted
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
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