Sponge bath it is.
where am i from again
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Randomize
