So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
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