Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
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