She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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