"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
