meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
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