are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize
