so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
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