guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize