To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize
