Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
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