Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
Randomize
