But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
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