id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
