She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
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