Where are you?
In a non slutty way
Ketchup is God's man juice
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
