Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
Randomize
