try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Still dying that you shit outside
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
